Hey, we get it. It’s not nice when other people try to take the government you tried to ruin and find a different way to ruin it.
A heartfelt letter to Tesla CEO and chief-DOGE-chainsaw-wielder Elon Musk, from America.
Dear Elon:
Hey, buddy. We hear you’re going through a bit of a rough patch lately. Your electric-car brand and overall reputation are in the toilet, people are saying not-nice things about you, and the whole “King of the Department of Government Efficiency” thing didn’t work out the way you wanted. We hear you basically gave up, took your exploding rocket and went home after deciding to leave Trump’s administration. (Oh, we forgot to mention that your rockets keep exploding. When it rains, it pours, right?)
Listen, we get it. There are a lot of emotions involved when a person realizes that bad behavior can have consequences. Just imagine how your best bud, Donald Trump, is going to feel if that should ever happen to him? We’re kidding. That’s never going to happen. But it is happening for you, pal, and we’re sorry nobody likes you. But we ‒ the good people of America ‒ want to help you learn from this experience.
The other day, you told The Washington Post that just because you barnstormed into the federal government as head of DOGE and started firing random people and upending years of foreign diplomacy and scientific research while proudly waving around a chainsaw, you were criticized for doing those very dumb things.
“DOGE is just becoming the whipping boy for everything,” ….
