SFGATE: Pete Hegseth is f—king embarrassing

SFGATE columnist Drew Magary on America’s secretary of war

Pete Hegseth! Remember that guy? Former Fox News weirdo? Famous for drinking on the job? Accused of sexual assault before paying a settlement to make that lawsuit go away? Tapped to head the Department of Defense and then accidentally texted his war plans to the editor-in-chief of the Atlantic? Oh yes, I think you’re quite familiar with Hegseth. He’s a real asshole! And an embarrassing one, too!

Well, guess what? The leaders of our armed forces also got to know this brave, pickled s—t for brains. In case you’ve stopped reading the news because it makes you want to seek out the sturdiest rafter in your basement, President Donald Trump and Hegseth summoned the top brass of the American military to Quantico, Virginia, on Tuesday for an all-hands meeting. This would be a super cool idea in, say, a “Mission: Impossible” movie. In real life, it’s a conference call that could have been an email. S—t, Hegseth is already a veteran of blasting out group messages for doing war. But using secure channels to issue directives means that Hegseth wouldn’t get to be seen issuing them. And in Donald Trump’s government, being seen is all that matters. So let’s see Hegseth rallying the troops on Tuesday and feel inspired!

Yes, the man in charge of our newly rechristened Department of War really took the stage in front of a bunch of seasoned, professional, high-ranking officers and proceeded to go epic bacon mode. Here’s the showstopper line from that clip:

“Should our enemies choose foolishly to challenge us, they will be crushed by the violence, precision and ferocity of the War Department. In other words, to our enemies, FAFO. If necessary, our troops can translate that for you.”

(sigh) It stands for “F—k around and find out.” What a powerful message to send. Because until Trump took office, we all know that other countries were like, “You know, the Americans seem pretty chill. I bet they’d never violently overreact to any perceived slight!”

I wish that this were the only cringe-worthy thing that Hegseth said to the crowd on Tuesday. But this is 2025, where wishes are zip-tied and forcefully deported to El Salvador. So Hegseth took the opportunity to deliver a full speech of cringe to our troops; a sort of “F—k you for your service” message that surely left all of the men and women in that room confident that their new boss totally knows what he’s doing. With that in mind, I collected a few more choice passages from Hegseth’s address for your perusal so that you and I can say “F—k you” right back to him. Let’s hear more!

“You see, this urgent moment of course requires more troops, more munitions, more drones, more Patriots, more submarines, more B-21 bombers. It requires more innovation, more AI in everything and ahead of the curve, more cyber effects, more counter UAS, more space, more speed.”

Just last month, Congress passed a funding bill for Hegseth’s department that clocked in at nearly $900 billion, a record high. I think that number allows for all the munitions, drones and robot sharks our military could possibly need. Then again, shouldn’t there be more AI in there, so that a drone pilot can take a pee-pee break while WarGPT detects and neutralizes a threat coming from Afgharistad? 

“Our warfighters are entitled to be led by the best and most capable leaders.”

Does that mean you’re resigning? Because that would probably do the trick.

“That is who we need you all to be. Even then, in combat, even if you do everything right, you may still lose people because the enemy always gets a vote.”

Just in case you were thrown by the vagueness here, “the enemy” in question is a gay voter.

“The military has been forced by foolish and reckless politicians to focus on the wrong things. … You might say we’re ending the war on warriors. I heard someone wrote a book about that.”

He did. Pete Hegseth wrote that book. Stick around after having your job threatened and he’ll sign YOUR copy! And you should stick around, because for far too long, this country has been far too hostile to its “warfighters.” Why just this past weekend, I watched NFL league officials burn a flag before kickoff between the Packers and Cowboys, and then kick every member of the color guard square in the crotch! Disgusting!

“For too long, we’ve promoted too many uniformed leaders for the wrong reasons, based on their race, based on gender quotas, based on historic so-called firsts.”

I can’t believe we promoted BLACKS to higher ranks. Did Jackie Robinson really die for this?

“We became the woke department.”

So true. Remember when they painted the Pentagon rainbow colors for Pride month?

“This administration has done a great deal from day one to remove the social justice, politically correct, and toxic ideological garbage that had infected our department, to rip out the politics.”

How’d you do it, Pete?

“No more identity months, DEI offices, dudes in dresses.”

Oh thank God. No more trans in uniform! That’s diluting our killforce with politics! You can’t hunt down Osama bin Laden using a gender-neutral latrine!

“No more climate change worship.”

Finally, I can stop worshipping the false idol that is the only inhabitable planet in the known universe. Earth: What it is good for?

“No more division, distraction or gender delusions. No more debris. As I’ve said before and will say again, we are done with that s—t.”

OMG HE SWORE! This guy isn’t some namby-pamby sissy boy! He’s like Axl Rose!

“The new War Department golden rule is this: do unto your unit as you would have done unto your own child’s unit. Would you want him serving with fat or unfit or under trained troops or alongside people who can’t meet basic standards, or in a unit where standards were lowered so certain types of troops could make it in, in a unit where leaders were promoted for reasons other than merit, performance and warfighting? The answer is not just no, it’s hell no.”

When I was in middle school, I had a T-shirt that said HELL NO TO FAT CHICKS. So I’m glad to see Secretary Pete is fully aligned with my values. And he’s not done taking it to our fattest service members! Give ’em hell, sir!

“It all starts with physical fitness and appearance. If the secretary of war can do regular hard PT, so can every member of our joint force. Frankly, it’s tiring to look out at combat formations, or really any formation, and see fat troops. Likewise, it’s completely unacceptable to see fat generals and admirals in the halls of the Pentagon and leading commands around the country and the world. It’s a bad look. It is bad, and it’s not who we are.”

This part makes perfect sense when you remember that President Lard wants everyone working for him to be hot enough to appear on television. If you’re a general in our army, and you’re not on an aggressive HGH regimen, or you’re unable to rock a pair of stiletto heels that makes Rupert Murdoch harder than an AP exam, you’re OUT.

“Also today, at my direction, every warrior across our joint force is required to do PT every duty day. It should be common sense, and most units do that already, but we’re codifying it. And we’re not talking, like, hot yoga and stretching.”

We’re not talking about QUEER physical training. And if you ask for avocado toast at the mess hall, that’s five months in the brig.

“This also means grooming standards. No more beards, long hair, superficial individual expression. We’re going to cut our hair, shave our beards, and adhere to standards.”

Has this idiot met the vice president? Because JD Vance has a beard for FM radio. 

“Because it’s like the broken windows theory in policing. It’s like you let the small stuff go, the big stuff eventually goes, so you have to address the small stuff.”

The broken windows theory was discredited many years ago and served largely as a template for then-NYC Mayor Rudy Giuliani to send turnstile jumpers directly to the electric chair.

“This is on duty, in the field and in the rear. If you want a beard, you can join Special Forces. If not, then shave. No more beardos. … The era of rampant and ridiculous shaving profiles is done.”

Damn, he hit JD with the “beardo” tag. No coming back from that. Anyway, I appreciate the War Department instituting a no facial hair policy right after the New York Yankees abandoned theirs (the Yankees stranded three runners in the bottom of the ninth Tuesday night and lost 3-1 to the hated Boston Red Sox).

“The definition of toxic has been turned upside down, and we’re correcting that. … We’re talking about words like bullying and hazing and toxic.”

The war on hazing is over! And just to make certain that bullies and hazers can flourish in the new Department of War, Hegseth and his boss are making it easier for enlistees to squeal on their commanding officers if those officers go toxic (woke)! Just like in the good old days! In fact, Hegseth now has a process for determining if you’re sufficiently old-school, and it’s rooted in hard science!

“Here are two basic frameworks I urge you to pursue in this process … the 1990 test and the E-6 test. The 1990 test is simple. What were the military standards in 1990? And if they have changed, tell me why.”

Because it’s 35 years later? Because American morale in 1990 was so low that Kurt Cobain was able to turn that ennui into culture-altering music?

“Was it a necessary change based on the evolving landscape of combat, or was the change due to a softening, weakening or gender-based pursuit of other priorities? 1990 seems to be as good a place to start as any.”

Here’s a random year that Pete drew out of a hat. BE MORE LIKE THIS YEAR. LISTEN TO MORE TRIXTER.

“Of course, being a racist has been illegal in our formation since 1948. The same goes for sexual harassment. Both are wrong and illegal. Those kinds of infractions will be ruthlessly enforced.”

BUT …?!

“But telling someone to shave or get a haircut or to get in shape or to fix their uniform or to show up on time, to work hard, that’s exactly the kind of discrimination we want.”

We will NOT tolerate discrimination in our ranks. Unless you’re fat, or weak, or gay, or trans, or a woman reporting sexual assault, or you have that sort of dirtbag goatee that every liquor store clerk has.

“We know mistakes will be made. It’s the nature of leadership.”

Like when you texted war plans to the Atlantic, yeah?

“But you should not pay for earnest mistakes for your entire career. And that’s why today, at my direction, we’re making changes to the retention of adverse information on personnel records that will allow leaders with forgivable earnest or minor infractions to not be encumbered by those infractions in perpetuity.”

All of you are entitled to violate a maximum three of your subordinates with a broomstick. If you need these violations to wage war properly, so be it.

“An entire generation of generals and admirals were told that they must parrot the insane fallacy that ‘our diversity is our strength.’ … They were told females and males are the same thing, or that males who think they’re females is totally normal. They were told that we need a green fleet and electric tanks. They were told to kick out Americans who refused an emergency vaccine.”

I will NOT stand here and let the department of woke discriminate against any soldier willing to infect his entire platoon with smallpox!

“We also don’t fight with stupid rules of engagement. We untie the hands of our warfighters to intimidate, demoralize, hunt and kill the enemies of our country. No more politically correct and overbearing rules of engagement, just common sense, maximum lethality and authority for warfighters.”

This was always the goal of conservatives decrying political correctness and wokeness. They didn’t just want license to treat nonwhite, non-hetero, non-males like garbage. They wanted license to abuse and to kill them should those people ever dare to pilot a boat. This ambition was clear during Trump’s first administration, when he pardoned former Navy SEAL Eddie Gallagher, who used his position as a sniper to gun down innocent Iraqis at randomAmon Goeth-style. SecWar Pete would now like all of our troops to Be Like Eddie. So don’t let the wokescolds tell you that killing is “wrong.” God, those people are such tight-asses!

“Today is another liberation day, the liberation of America’s warriors, in name, in deed and in authorities. You kill people and break things for a living. You are not politically correct and don’t necessarily belong always in polite society.”

I know I feel better when the man tasked with supervising the most lethal military in world history addresses his charges like they’re the prisoners from “Con Air.” Like Trump, Hegseth delivers this speech as if he’s starring in his own biopic. You can hear him waiting for a standing ovation that never comes, and it’s pathetic. This meeting served only the secretary’s whiskey-addled daydreams, and not a single active member of our armed forces. Many of the quotes you read above will be etched in stone one day, on a monument that will be torn down by a joyous protest mob.

This has been a deeply embarrassing time to be an American, and somehow Pete Hegseth has made that embarrassment even more pronounced. I bet all of the men and women and gender-fluid people (I’m woke, deal with it) in that room on Tuesday were also embarrassed. These people enlisted out of love for their country, and to do something valuable with their lives. Now they have to take orders from a narcissistic lunatic who wants them to cut weight so they can kill and pillage more efficiently. It’s disgraceful. It’s also just so, so uncomfortable. I wanna bury myself alive when I read all of this dogs—t.

At least Hegseth, toward the end of his speech, gave those same hardworking Americans an out:

“If the words I’m speaking today are making your heart sink, then you should do the honorable thing and resign. We would thank you for your service.”

That’s actually a threat, because this administration knows only how to speak in threats. But you know what? I say you folks should call the man’s bluff. Please, all of you, resign. Quit your jobs. Don’t work another second for this corrupt department. Pete Hegseth spent all of Tuesday f—king around with our service members. Time for him to find out.

https://www.sfgate.com/politics/article/pete-hegseth-is-embarrassing-21078716.php

Axios: ICE arrests rock Malden, Somerville

It’s a familiar scene: neighbors, attorneys and activists rallying with immigrant families over the loved ones lost in the federal immigration system.

  • Dozens came together in Malden on Monday, this time for Edgar Hernan Elias Escobar.

The big picture: Elias Escobar, a native of El Salvador with no criminal record, joins a growing population of newcomers disappearing from the streets of Malden, Somerville and other Boston-area communities in the past two weeks.

Catch up quick: Elias Escobar, an undocumented immigrant who was obtaining papers through a family-based petition from his wife, was stopped by immigration agents on his way to a construction job Wednesday.

  • Agents smashed his car window and pulled him out, even after his wife, Leslie Perlera Gonzalez, showed up saying he had a pending immigration petition, GBH News reported.
  • A Department of Homeland Security official later told Axios he refused to roll down his window and that the “officers took appropriate action and followed their training to use the minimum amount of force necessary to resolve the situation.”

State of play: Elias Escobar is detained in the Plymouth County Correctional Center with other immigrant detainees.

  • Greater Boston Legal Services, where Perlera Gonzalez works, filed a lawsuit alleging his rights were violated.

Yes, but: The Trump administration has fought habeas lawsuits over immigrant detainees tooth and nail since ramping up immigration enforcement this year.

Context: Immigrants have historically been allowed to adjust their status through a handful of avenues if they have a relative or spouse who is a U.S. citizen.

  • With the exception of the first Trump administration, it is uncommon for immigration officials to detain and seek to deport an immigrant mid-petition or with legal status if the person poses no public safety threat, said Maggie Morgan, managing attorney for the GBLS immigration unit.

Morgan says she has seen reports of immigration agents detaining people before confirming their identity or status.

  • “This is violating due process not just for those individuals, but for everyone in the community who could be at risk of having this happen to them,” Morgan said.

Zoom out: The LUCE hotline has received more than 100 calls in the last week flagging immigration enforcement activity.

  • Somerville residents tried to stop immigration agents from questioning a man they stopped. He complied and, within minutes, was placed in handcuffs despite having no known record, Rep. Mike Connolly told the Cambridge Day.

What they’re saying: “I believe that if Hernan doesn’t get to come home, it has little to do with the rights or whether he deserves to be an American and more to do with the U.S. deciding who it likes,” Frank Pinto, Perlera Gonzalez’s cousin, told the crowd Monday morning.

The other side: The DHS official said any claims of racial profiling are “categorically false.”

  • “What makes someone a target of ICE is that they are in our country illegally—not their skin color,” the official said. “DHS enforcement operations are highly targeted, and officers do their due diligence.”

What we’re watching: A federal judge will have to decide whether Elias Escobar’s lawsuit can move forward and if he can continue to pursue his immigration application.

https://www.axios.com/local/boston/2025/09/22/ice-arrests-malden-somerville

Intelligencer: Top Goon – Kristi [“Bimbo #2”] Noem is the face of Trump’s police state. Corey Lewandowski is the muscle. Who really runs DHS?

“She’s a petty, vindictive person who is only ever out for herself. She doesn’t do anything unless it’s calculated to better her political aspirations.”

On the morning of May 7, before making his way to Capitol Hill to testify in front of Congress, Cameron Hamilton, then the acting administrator of the Federal Emergency Management Agency, packed up his office. He assumed his boss, Department of Homeland Security Secretary Kristi [“Bimbo #2”] Noem, would fire him once she got wind of what he planned on telling lawmakers. It turned out he was right about getting fired but wrong about who would deliver the blow.

Hamilton is a former Navy SEAL with a close-cropped beard and perfect posture. He is a MAGA true believer who served in the State Department during Donald Trump’s first administration and ran for Congress in Virginia with the backing of the conservative Freedom Caucus super-PAC in 2024. He lost his primary, but after Trump won the presidency, [“Bimbo #2”] Noem offered him the opportunity to run FEMA. He soon found himself crosswise with not only [“Bimbo #2”] Noem but also her de facto chief of staff, Corey Lewandowski, a combative veteran of Trumpworld’s internecine battles.

When Hamilton interviewed for the job during the transition, [“Bimbo #2”] Noem had expressed no interest in eliminating FEMA. But as Trump’s second administration got underway, it became clear that DHS, a sprawling entity with more than 260,000 employees across various agencies, was being utilized to counter seemingly a single threat: illegal immigration. [“Bimbo #2”] Noem joined Trump’s call to shutter FEMA, which seemed like a bad idea to Hamilton as wildfires and tornadoes took an unprecedented toll on states from California to Arkansas. He was vocal enough about this belief that when CNN reported in March on a meeting about the agency’s future — a meeting that included Hamilton, Lewandowski, and [“Bimbo #2”] Noem — Lewandowski accused Hamilton of being the source. Hamilton was in a classified briefing when he got a “furious” call from Lewandowski.

“Somebody needs to be fired for this,” Lewandowski told him.

“I’m not a leaker,” Hamilton said.

“Well, if you didn’t leak it, you’ll have no problem submitting to a polygraph,” Lewandowski said.

Hamilton, who said he took the job out of patriotic duty, was incensed by the insinuation that he had snitched. “I wanted to choke some people,” he said. The polygraph was an “exhaustive process” that ended with him being cleared, but he believed his days were numbered: Lewandowski was lobbying to replace him with David Richardson, who had no experience managing natural disasters. (Lewandowski had blurbed Richardson’s 2019 novel, War Story, as “brutal, funny in places, unapologetic. Will make liberals cringe!”) On the day Hamilton testified to the House Appropriations Subcommittee on Homeland Security, he declared, “I do not believe it is in the best interest of the American people to eliminate the Federal Emergency Management Agency,” an opinion whose merits were borne out by disasters like the catastrophic floods in Texas later that summer.

“I got a call the next morning saying I had 30 minutes to report to DHS headquarters,” he said. Once there, Hamilton was escorted to the office of the secretary. But when he walked in, [“Bimbo #2”] Noem wasn’t behind her desk. Lewandowski was. “He said, ‘You are losing your access,’” Hamilton told me. Lewandowski smirked as he offered Hamilton “an opportunity” to work at the Department of Education, perhaps one of the only departments more scorned by the Trump administration than FEMA. The message to Hamilton: Take the new position or be terminated.

Hamilton said it wasn’t a surprise that Lewandowski was the messenger, even if Lewandowski, technically an unpaid and temporary special government employee, wasn’t his boss. Lewandowski has long served as [“Bimbo #2”] Noem’s gatekeeper, described to me by DHS staff as her “handler,” her “bulldog,” and the “shadow secretary.” They are also widely understood by those who work with them to be romantically attached. ([“Bimbo #2”] Noem and Lewandowski have both denied this.) In April, the Daily Mail snapped photographs of Lewandowski outside her Navy Yard complex with a duffel bag slung over his shoulder, and partly in response to the presence of the Mail’s paparazzi, which a DHS spokesperson said had led to threats and safety concerns, she moved into military housing usually reserved for the top admiral of the Coast Guard, which is under DHS’s purview. This has only fueled the rumors surrounding [“Bimbo #2”] Noem. “They’ve sent no three- or four-stars in the Coast Guard up for confirmation,” a top administration official told me, “because she doesn’t want to get kicked out of the commandant’s house.”

[“Bimbo #2”] Noem, 53, is the public face of the department, bringing reality-star energy to an office that was created in the aftermath of 9/11 to coordinate America’s preparedness for a terrorist attack. She has hopped across the country in various uniforms — as a Border Patrol agent, in an Immigration and Customs Enforcement flak jacket, as a Coast Guard firefighter — mean-mugging her way onto television screens and decorating the halls of DHS buildings with action shots of her in the field. Most notoriously, when the U.S. sent 238 migrants to El Salvador’s Terrorism Confinement Center — described as a “hell on earth,” where alleged human-rights abuses are rampant — she filmed a video in front of a cage of inmates wearing a $50,000 Rolex. “We looked at her and we thought we were going to get out,” Edicson Quintero Chacón, a detainee at the time, told me. “I mean, we had a sense of joy.” Her reasons for visiting CECOT were more self-interested. She is so skilled at getting in front of the camera that the New York Times has called her the head of the “Department of Homeland Publicity,” while her liberal detractors have taken to calling her “ICE Barbie.”

Since the passage of the One Big Beautiful Bill Act in July, she has been overseeing a massive influx of some $170 billion that Republicans set aside for combating illegal immigration, money that will go toward expanding DHS’s detention capacity to 100,000 beds (ICE is currently holding more than 58,000 detainees), increasing the size of ICE (in part by offering up to $50,000 in signing bonuses and eliminating the age cap on new hires), bolstering law-enforcement border support, and underwriting a propaganda campaign that has clogged social media with everything from Zero Dark Thirty–style PSAs to paeans to white-nationalist mythology. Under [“Bimbo #2”] Noem, it is DHS, not the Justice Department, that has emerged as Trump’s most devastating and visible weapon against the right’s perceived enemies. “She’s going to play a key role in advancing Donald Trump’s effort to consolidate the powers of the presidency,” a former DHS official told me. “I think by the end of this administration, if she stays the whole time, she’s likely to become the warden of the police state.”

On paper, [“Bimbo #2”] Noem sits at the top of this empire. In practice, power over immigration policy is fractured, shaped by competing factions, starting with deputy chief of staff Stephen Miller, who has vowed in the wake of Charlie Kirk’s assassination to destroy nameless forces that have conspired against the right — the long arm of law enforcement, he warned them, “will be used to find you, will be used to take away your money, take away your power, and, if you’ve broken the law, to take away your freedom.” [“Bimbo #2”] Noem will be among those at the forefront of any such effort, surrounded by a tight inner circle that can be difficult to penetrate and often impossible to work with. “The culture over there is terrible,” the administration official told me. “People are scared shitless of Corey.”

Lewandowski has been integral to [“Bimbo #2”] Noem’s rise, her right hand as they run roughshod over the rule of law and, like so many in Trump’s Cabinet, position themselves for a post-Trump future. Lewandowski is not only surreptitiously co-leading DHS without congressional approval but has brought Trumpworld’s manically pugnacious style to the department and drawn out some of [“Bimbo #2”] Noem’s own pugnacious predilections, too. After all, Trump’s immigration policies, while broadly unpopular with those who oppose masked men snatching people off the streets and spiriting them away to brutal foreign prisons, remain popular among Republicans. Frank Luntz, the veteran political consultant, thinks this is at least partly owed to [“Bimbo #2”] Noem, who adds the necessary stage presence to Lewandowski’s muscle and Miller’s brain. “She is probably the administration’s best spokeswoman,” he told me. “The only thing that bothers me is that her name is not mentioned as a potential 2028 Republican Party leader. She’s underestimated.”

The story of [“Bimbo #2”] Noem and Lewandowski goes back to 2019 on a remote Pacific island off northwestern British Columbia. They had arrived via helicopter as guests of the multimillionaire Republican donor Foster Friess, who was hosting his annual deep-sea-fishing fundraiser. [“Bimbo #2”] Noem was a rising conservative star recently elected governor of South Dakota after an eight-year stint in Congress, while Lewandowski was the former campaign manager for Trump. She once wrote that she “wasn’t emotional about anything.” He once told the Washington Post, “I’m like a robot. I literally have no emotions.”

Lewandowski had come to Trump’s 2016 campaign with an unconventional résumé: real-estate agent, New Hampshire marine-patrol officer, Koch Brothers operative, congressional aide who once brought a gun to the Capitol. His longtime political ally David Bossie told the Times in 2015 that Lewandowski was “as anti-Establishment” as Trump. “Corey is driven by an incredible desire to please and be loved by those in positions of power, all while fighting against convention and normal ways of operating,” a campaign operative who worked with Lewandowski told me. He quickly became known for two things: getting arrested after grabbing the arm of a FEMAle reporter at a press conference (charges were dropped) and a political strategy that amounted to “Let Trump be Trump.” He lost his job after allies and donors complained he was running an undisciplined campaign.

In the years that followed, Lewandowski would float in and out of Trumpworld but never fall completely out of Trump’s orbit. “The president has always been loyal to people he connects with successful phases of his life,” former Trump adviser Jason Miller told me. Lewandowski’s aggression was also useful. “He is not intimidated by the prospect of a fight and will work doggedly to achieve his pursuits,” the campaign operative told me. “He is a one-of-a-kind operator, for better or worse.” In response to a request for comment, Lewandowski wrote, “Instead of reviewing the newest wine bar in Chelsea the New York Magazine has degraded itself.”

At the time he met [“Bimbo #2”] Noem, Lewandowski was casting a line for another project. “I think he saw potential in her,” said Lynn Friess, who was married to Foster until his death in 2021. The fishing trips were an excellent way for people to get to know one another, as they spent hours on end in small boats, then returned to camp to talk about everything from politics to family life. Friess remembers [“Bimbo #2”] Noem being an excellent angler, hauling in fish after fish. “I quite frankly don’t remember what he did,” she said about Lewandowski. Later, Friess emailed an update: After asking around, she was told Lewandowski had caught one of the biggest fish in the group.

[“Bimbo #2”] Noem stayed close with Lewandowski after the trip and eventually brought him on as an adviser. He was, according to a former staffer from the time, “intimately involved in her governorship.” He helped decide which television shows to go on and encouraged her never to do panels with other guests because she was too big of a star to share the spotlight. He joined her on phone calls with senior staff, dictating which events she should attend in the state. “It bothered people because what did he even know about South Dakota?” the former staffer said.

But Lewandowski seemed like he was already thinking beyond state politics. Early on in their relationship, Lewandowski brought [“Bimbo #2”] Noem on a swing through New York to talk to financiers who might be helpful were she ever to run for higher office. In one meeting, they appeared to have such a close connection that their millionaire host called a mutual acquaintance afterward to ask if the two were dating. The mutual acquaintance called around and reported back it appeared that they were. They both were, and remain, married, though [“Bimbo #2”] Noem’s husband, Bryon Noem, lives in South Dakota. Over the years, there have been plenty of tabloid reports about [“Bimbo #2”] Noem and Lewandowski’s relationship. “Everybody knows they’re together. Can I prove it? No, but they’re together,” the administration official said. A FEMA official called it the “worst-kept secret in D.C.” In 2019, after a conservative conference in Doral, Florida, a bunch of VIPs were on the patio smoking cigars and drinking. Then [“Bimbo #2”] Noem came out and sat on Lewandowski’s lap. “I remember it being just very romantic,” said a person present. “Interactions that you would expect of a romantic couple, not of a political consultant and the client.” They added, “It was very clear that they were together.”

Ideologically, [“Bimbo #2”] Noem was difficult to pin down. She worked on her family farm before Democratic senator Tom Daschle appointed her to the state board of the Farm Service Agency in 1997. When she ran for the statehouse as a Republican, she said some conservatives doubted her credentials. “People wondered for years if maybe I switched to the Democrat Party to serve,” [“Bimbo #2”] Noem wrote in her book, Not My First Rodeo. “Of course, I never did, and to his credit Senator Daschle never asked.” After serving in the state legislature, she ran with tea-party support for Congress in 2010, only to disappoint some of her bomb-throwing compatriots by becoming a lieutenant for House leadership. As governor, she championed legislation to keep transgender athletes out of women’s sports but vetoed the bill under pressure, in part, from the NCAA. Then, like most Republicans looking to move up within the party, she fully leaned in as a MAGA loyalist.

Beth Hollatz, a senior adviser during [“Bimbo #2”] Noem’s governorship and a close friend, said [“Bimbo #2”] Noem was driven by religious faith and love of her family. “People think she’s coldhearted,” she said. “But she’s not at all.” Others said [“Bimbo #2”] Noem was virtually an empty vessel. “Beyond just basic conservative principles, she never had an original policy idea or thought at all,” a former campaign aide told me. “She never read books or newspapers or newsmagazines, had zero interest in policy.” Like Trump, her management style, the aide said, “revolves around whoever is the last person to speak to her.” She had a nickname among staff, “Governor Text Message,” because she did much of her managing via phone.

[“Bimbo #2”] Noem could be warm and friendly only to turn it off moments later. Once, a former staffer recalled, a supporter brought [“Bimbo #2”] Noem flowers, which [“Bimbo #2”] Noem pretended to love but then had a staffer throw in the trash as soon as her constituent left. “She was rolling her eyes and said, ‘Ugh, I can’t stand these people,’” she said. “It made me wonder whether she was bad-mouthing me behind my back.”

[“Bimbo #2”] Noem’s tenure as governor was dotted with oddities. She was found by South Dakota ethics board to have intervened in her daughter’s application to become a state-sanctioned real-estate appraiser. She came up with the idea for a $1.4 million anti-drug campaign that resulted in the tagline “Meth. We’re on it.” She earned a reputation among lawmakers for enjoying the perks of office a little too much, traveling often on the state’s plane and spending taxpayer money on a hunting trip to Canada and a trip to Las Vegas, among other destinations with no obvious bearing on state business. Taffy Howard, a Republican state senator who clashed with [“Bimbo #2”] Noem over the years, said she and some of her fellow lawmakers tried to force [“Bimbo #2”] Noem to reveal how much money was being spent on her travel but were told revealing that information would be a security issue. “You could not oppose her without her taking it personally,” Howard said.

Once, [“Bimbo #2”] Noem hitched a ride on My Pillow CEO Mike Lindell’s plane to a conference in Tennessee. “She was never here,” said Ryan Maher, a Republican who served in state-senate leadership while [“Bimbo #2”] Noem was governor. [“Bimbo #2”] Noem declined a request for an interview. In response to a list of questions about [“Bimbo #2”] Noem, DHS said, “This NYMag hit piece reads like a preteen rage-scrolling, then prompting ChatGPT for a screed on misogyny — complete with zero substance and maximum bullshit.”

Still, as a telegenic communicator and Trump loyalist, [“Bimbo #2”] Noem remained a popular governor. She earned credit from Republicans at home and across the country for how she handled the COVID pandemic (namely, by keeping the state mostly open while other states shut down) and for sending members of the South Dakota National Guard to the southern border.

By the time the 2024 election cycle began, [“Bimbo #2”] Noem was being talked about as a possible vice-presidential pick for Trump. In South Dakota political circles, her higher ambitions were not a surprise. “Every decision she makes is to help her, help her career, help her get a better job down the road,” said Tom Brunner, a conservative who used to serve with [“Bimbo #2”] Noem in the state legislature. “She would sell her soul in a heartbeat to get a better job.” Howard said, “She’s a petty, vindictive person who is only ever out for herself. She doesn’t do anything unless it’s calculated to better her political aspirations.”

In February 2024, [“Bimbo #2”] Noem met with Trump to make her case to join the ticket. She was accompanied by Lewandowski, who came prepared with polling data showing how popular she was in midwestern swing states, according to the book Revenge, by the journalist Alex Isenstadt. But there were obstacles to her getting the job — the foremost being Lewandowski himself. People close to Trump worried about their alleged romantic involvement, Isenstadt wrote. Trump’s advisers had witnessed Lewandowski slapping [“Bimbo #2”] Noem on the butt, and Trump would slyly refer to [“Bimbo #2”] Noem as Lewandowski’s “girlfriend.” [“Bimbo #2”] Noem’s chances at securing the No. 2 spot were ultimately buried by the publication of her second memoir, No Going Back, in which she told the unfortunate story of shooting a disobedient puppy named Cricket on the family farm. “That’s not good at all,” Trump told his son Don Jr., according to Revenge. “Even you wouldn’t kill a dog, and you kill everything.”

With the VP job now off the table, Lewandowski and [“Bimbo #2”] Noem had another idea: Perhaps she could be the general in charge of immigration. By August, Trump had brought Lewandowski back to his campaign, but he lost a power struggle with co–campaign managers Chris LaCivita and Susie Wiles and was demoted to surrogate work. In the meantime, he mounted a whisper campaign on behalf of [“Bimbo #2”] Noem, enlisting the help of people like Tom Homan, who would go on to become Trump’s border czar, to talk up her campaign to lead DHS. After Trump won the election, he asked [“Bimbo #2”] Noem if she might be interested in a Cabinet position, perhaps with the Department of Interior or Agriculture. “I said, ‘Sir, I’d like to be considered for Homeland Security,’” [“Bimbo #2”] Noem recalled during a speech this summer on Capitol Hill. “And he said, ‘Why would you want to do that?’” The answer she gave: “Because it’s your No. 1 priority.” [“Bimbo #2”] Noem was easily confirmed on a 59-34 vote.

[“Bimbo #2”] Noem returned to Washington having gone through a near-complete physical transformation. Long, curled hair had replaced her layered bobs, and the topography of her face had been smoothed. Before moving out of the governor’s mansion, [“Bimbo #2”] Noem flew to Texas to have her teeth done, after which she filmed what appeared to be an infomercial-style social-media video for the dentist. Once in Washington, [“Bimbo #2”] Noem and Lewandowski seemed to always be around each other. “He had a seat at the vice-president’s inauguration dinner,” an attendee told me, “where he was looking directly at her at all times.”

When Trump picked [“Bimbo #2”] Noem for DHS, Lewandowski hoped he would be named chief of staff. It wasn’t in the cards. The Wall Street Journal reported earlier this year that the tabloid reports of his romantic relationship with [“Bimbo #2”] Noem were a sticking point. But apparently there were other issues as well. In September, the Daily Mail reported the existence of a memo written by Richard McComb, the chief security officer at DHS at the time, containing a litany of concerns regarding Lewandowski and questioning whether he should have a top-secret security clearance. Lewandowski had, according to the memo, been accused of receiving $50,000 directly from the Chinese Communist Party as well as money from Israel’s Likud Party without disclosing the payments on his DHS background form. (A DHS official denied these claims.)

The memo also detailed known instances of Lewandowski’s entanglements with the law, including an alleged incident of unwanted sexual contact. In 2021, a woman accused Lewandowski of touching her inappropriately and relentlessly making sexually explicit comments at a charity dinner in Las Vegas. Lewandowski was charged and cut a plea deal in 2022 that resulted in eight hours of impulse-control counseling and 50 hours of community service. In exchange, Lewandowski did not have to admit guilt. The same month he issued the memo, McComb resigned from DHS.

After losing out on the chief-of-staff job, Lewandowski finagled the special-government-employee designation, which allowed him to work 130 days a year for the DHS while maintaining a business with outside clients. Best of all, he wouldn’t have to disclose those clients, making it difficult to determine if they might present a conflict of interest with the work he was doing for the government. There have been red flags. In March, DHS skipped a fully competitive bidding process for the first part of a $200 million ad campaign, giving part of the contract to a firm run by a person with close professional ties to Lewandowski. Furthermore, few people in the administration believe he was keeping an accurate tally of the days he worked. In mid-August, after months of working closely with [“Bimbo #2”] Noem, Axios reported that Lewandowski wasn’t even close to his 130-day allotment. The report said that he was believed to be entering buildings with other staffers so he wouldn’t have to swipe himself in and that he didn’t always use his government email or phone so that his digital trail was harder to follow. The number he gave — precisely 69 days — was like a bad joke conjured up by Elon Musk. “That number was Corey’s way of saying, ‘Fuck you,’” a former DHS official said.

As soon as Trump entered office, [“Bimbo #2”] Noem & Co. went to work forming a new anti-immigration regime, transforming DHS into the country’s most fearsome law-enforcement arm. It is now endangering the constitutional rights of citizens and noncitizens alike — and it is doing so openly, even proudly. During his first two weeks on the job, Trump signed an order that attempted to end birthright citizenship and another to begin preparing Guantánamo Bay to detain tens of thousands of undocumented immigrants. In March, the administration invoked the Alien Enemies Act of 1798, claiming it could deport migrants without a hearing owing to an “invasion” of gang members from Venezuela. Later, a federal judge ordered planes carrying detainees to El Salvador to be returned to the U.S., but the planes continued on their flight in defiance of the judge’s ruling. On one of these flights was Kilmar Abrego Garcia, a Maryland man who had been granted legal protection because of legitimate concerns for his safety. The Trump administration admitted Garcia’s deportation was a mistake but claimed there was nothing it could do about it now that he was no longer in U.S. custody; Garcia later claimed he was beaten and psychologically tortured, while other deportees have said they were sexually assaulted.

Back home, ICE grabbed Palestinian green-card holder Mahmoud Khalil and kept him for more than 100 days in a detention center in Jena, Louisiana. A judge later ruled his capture unconstitutional, and other detainees at Jena have complained of overcrowding, cells contaminated with feces, and being denied medication. DHS detained Mohsen Mahdawi, also a Palestinian green-card holder, at his citizenship interview; nabbed Rümeysa Öztürk, a Turkish Ph.D. student, off the streets in Massachusetts; and held an Irish tourist for more than three months after he overstayed his visa by three days. “Nobody is safe,” he told the Guardian. The DHS X account has encouraged Americans to “Report Foreign Invaders,” and cities including Los Angeles, Washington, D.C., and Chicago have become staging grounds for militarized immigration raids. “They are grabbing people who have brown skin or who speak with an accent or who speak another language and not people who are guilty of or are accused of perpetrating a crime,” Illinois governor J. B. Pritzker said in September.

New detention centers with macabre nicknames have started to spring up across the country: Alligator Alcatraz in Florida, the Cornhusker Clink in Nebraska, the Speedway Slammer in Indiana. ICE’s own inspectors found that migrants housed in a detention center in Fort Bliss in Texas had been subject to conditions that violated at least 60 federal standards, according to a report by the Washington Post, including many of the detainees being unable to contact their lawyers for weeks. South Korean workers detained in a raid on a Hyundai-LG factory in Georgia described being crammed into windowless rooms with few bathrooms and moldy beds, while ICE guards mocked them for being from “North Korea.” Democratic senator Jon Ossoff says his office has compiled credible reports of more than 500 human-rights abuses in immigration detention centers since the beginning of Trump’s term.

The Trump-friendly Supreme Court, in part through the use of its so-called shadow docket, has given DHS a green light to run rampant. The Court even reversed a judgment that blocked ICE agents from stopping people and questioning them solely based on factors like their ethnicity. As a result of all these changes, the number of illegal border crossings has plummeted, the number of detentions has hit record highs, and, according to DHS, 2 million undocumented immigrants have either left the country or been deported (though the number has not been independently verified) — and ICE hasn’t even fully utilized the funding increase that makes its annual budget larger than the FBI’s.

[“Bimbo #2”] Noem leaped on to this agenda, developing a reputation as a ruthless enforcer. A South Park episode devoted to [“Bimbo #2”] Noem showed her raiding Heaven for undocumented immigrants and, in a callback to poor Cricket, gunning down several dogs. But her efforts put her in good stead with the Trump administration. “Secretary [“Bimbo #2”] Noem is returning America to the American People,” Stephen Miller said in an email. By all accounts, the president likes [“Bimbo #2”] Noem, describing her as both “elegant” and “tough as hell.” It helps that [“Bimbo #2”] Noem and Lewandowski have their own fiefdom, since getting too much attention can be a dangerous game in Trump’s Washington, where no one is allowed to overshadow the boss. “They sort of avoid being at the White House,” the administration official told me. “And I think they do that because they don’t want to be overexposed.” Lewandowski, he said, knows better than anybody that “one of the best ways to survive is to stay off the radar.”

At the same time, [“Bimbo #2”] Noem wants to be as closely associated with Trump’s draconian regime as possible. Once, according to a former DHS official, [“Bimbo #2”] Noem grew angry with Homan after he went on television to discuss immigration news, believing that he had “gotten out front” of her on the issue. “She tried to put a comms blackout on him,” another administration official told me. “She ordered that he not go on TV; she ordered that basically no one go on TV in the entire Homeland lane.” [“Bimbo #2”] Noem tried to tell Homan that he worked for her. He told her he worked for the White House. Her relationship with Homan got so sour that, at a meeting earlier this year, Trump asked Homan whether he needed to intervene. “No, sir, we can work this out,” Homan responded. The White House told me, “The President’s entire team — including Border Czar Tom Homan and Secretary [“Bimbo #2”] Noem — are all in lockstep.”

As part of DHS’s advertising blitz, [“Bimbo #2”] Noem filmed a series of ads thanking Trump for “securing our border and putting America first,” while urging undocumented immigrants to self-deport. “We will hunt you down,” she said. The TV spots looked, even to some members of [“Bimbo #2”] Noem’s team, like the start of a state-sponsored presidential campaign. “They were running on Fox News and everywhere in places they would run if she were running for president, not places where illegal aliens might see them,” a DHS employee told me. “It was a taxpayer-dollar-funded ad for her to position herself.”

None of this is to say that [“Bimbo #2”] Noem is fully in charge of Trump’s immigration policy. Deputy chief of staff Miller, an immigration obsessive, is Trump’s most trusted policy adviser. It was Miller who reportedly set a 3,000-deportations-a-day goal for ICE early in the administration, a number so high that it remains elusive today, and it’s Miller who speaks with DHS most days to get reports on how things are going. Miller has also been one of the most outspoken administration officials in calling for a crackdown on the “radical left” in the aftermath of Kirk’s assassination, though [“Bimbo #2”] Noem herself also mentioned her connection to the former campus activist, telling conservative media that one of his last text messages to her called for mayors and governors to be held accountable for overseeing high levels of crime.

[“Bimbo #2”] Noem’s belligerent approach is reflected within the department, where she is an isolated and isolating figure. She has, according to a person close to the administration, gone to the White House multiple times to try to replace Troy Edgar, one of her deputies. A very tight circle of aides runs day-to-day operations. Lewandowski, in particular, was described to me as a micromanager who will approve and deny travel requests made by ICE employees. He has been responsible for firing and reassigning dozens of people within the agency, and they are afraid to push back because he might call and “rip their heads off,” according to the person close to the administration.

Another person close to the administration told me that Lewandowski once called a DHS employee with marching orders. The employee replied that he didn’t take instruction from Lewandowski but from [“Bimbo #2”] Noem. “All of a sudden, you hear the secretary say, ‘It’s coming from me,’” the person familiar told me. “She was on the call, in the background, not saying anything.” Matt Strickland, a former contractor who worked at DHS headquarters, told me that all the major decisions in the Countering Weapons of Mass Destruction Office had to be run by Lewandowski. “Corey Lewandowski is running DHS. Kristi [“Bimbo #2”] Noem is just the face of it,” he said. After tweeting in support of FEMA’s Hamilton, Strickland says he was warned he could be fired. When the order finally came down, he was told that it was from Lewandowski and a member of a group of senior officials Lewandowski has dubbed “the Four Horsemen.”

Another of [“Bimbo #2”] Noem’s deputies is Madison Sheahan, 28, who just six years ago was the captain of the rowing team at Ohio State University and who now is the deputy director of ICE. “For the most part, every entity in ICE reports to me,” Sheahan told me in an interview at ICE headquarters in southwest Washington. Sheahan is broad-shouldered with a punishing handshake. She told me she doesn’t sweat the controversial parts of her job. “I understand that everyone wants to poke holes and say we aren’t perfect, and we aren’t,” she said. “But we’ll never know how much ICE prevented — the number of kids that we’ve saved and families that we’ve saved.”

She first began working for [“Bimbo #2”] Noem pretty much right out of college, as a body woman and policy aide when [“Bimbo #2”] Noem was governor. “She genuinely believes she was called to serve by God,” she said of [“Bimbo #2”] Noem. They grew close enough to consider each other friends. Once, [“Bimbo #2”] Noem invited Sheahan to run a half-marathon with her. When Sheahan asked her boss if she needed Gatorade about a mile from the finish line, [“Bimbo #2”] Noem said “yes,” only to sprint ahead when Sheahan popped over to a hydration table. [“Bimbo #2”] Noem beat her by about ten feet. “That really describes her,” Sheahan told me. “She’s gonna have fun. She’s gonna do her job. But she’s gonna win, too.”

Some ICE officials call Sheahan “Fish Cop” behind her back because of her previous stint running the Department of Wildlife and Fisheries in Louisiana. Sheahan knows there are people who think that, without any law-enforcement background, she isn’t qualified for a job usually occupied by veteran ICE officials. “I absolutely think I’m qualified for the job,” she told me. “Because at the end of the day, what really makes anybody qualified for any job?”

If Miller sets the policies, [“Bimbo #2”] Noem and Lewandowski have nevertheless centralized power at DHS to an unprecedented degree. In June, a memo from [“Bimbo #2”] Noem went out saying secretarial approval was needed for all payments above $100,000, superseding a previous threshold of $25 million. This was, in theory, a way to make sure the secretary could be a better steward of the taxpayer dollar. In practice, it meant chaos. “I can’t make a phone call for under a hundred grand,” a former top FEMA official remembered thinking when the memo landed in his inbox. There are thousands of contracts worth $100,000 or more, and a backlog was inevitable.

“They almost had their utilities shut off at the building because the bill wasn’t paid,” the former FEMA official told me. A government-mandated return-to-office policy meant that the FEMA building went from having hundreds of staffers to thousands but saw no corresponding increase in janitorial services. It could feel, the official said, “like you needed an appointment” to use a restroom. Another former FEMA official told me that FEMA headquarters came within hours of having the lights turned off.

The bottleneck affected mission-critical work as well. Two days after catastrophic floods inundated Central Texas this summer, FEMA did not answer nearly two-thirds of calls to its disaster-assistance line, the New York Times reported, because [“Bimbo #2”] Noem had not renewed a contract for hundreds of workers at call centers. And in September, Ted Budd, a Republican senator from North Carolina, threatened to filibuster Homeland Security nominees until the department stops “stonewalling” payments for the recovery efforts stemming from Hurricane Helene last year.

In July, FEMA created a task force of about 30 employees to compile a list of crucial contracts that are soon to expire. Many of these employees were taken off their day jobs to work on this task force, where they spent upwards of 15 hours a day in a windowless room, poring over paperwork. “She’s supposed to be the one cutting red tape, not creating it,” a former FEMA official familiar with the process told me. “It feels like intentional busywork, like a way to destroy the agency from the inside.”

It’s not just FEMA. The backlog has affected parts of DHS that the administration cares about. The Times reported this summer that the Transportation Security Administration allowed a contract for airport-screening equipment that helps detect fake passports to expire as well as contracts with Customs and Border Protection to help administer polygraph tests to applicants for law-enforcement jobs. And in early September, DHS staff received an email stating that its daily immigration-enforcement report would not be available. “Due to a contracting lapse, we will not be able to update the data today until the issue is resolved,” the email said.

DHS spokeswoman Tricia McLaughlin said the new rules came about after [“Bimbo #2”] Noem learned about massive contracts getting signed for deals she knew nothing about. Already the DHS has saved taxpayers more than $10 billion, McLaughlin said. “It’s not just a talking point,” McLaughlin told me.

Lewandowski is intimately involved with contract work. One former DHS official told me he kept a list of vendors that are banned from doing business with the department. And this past summer, Politico reported that Lewandowski had veto power over contracts and is the last stop before they are sent to [“Bimbo #2”] Noem’s desk. “Everything has to go through Corey,” a lobbyist who has done business with DHS told me. “It’s all based on ‘You’re my buddy, or you’re not my buddy. You hired my friend, or you didn’t hire my friend.’ That place just runs that way.” As one former administration official put it to me, “It’s the Corey show over there.”

In late August, articles in several outlets detailed the delays in contract approvals, which DHS officials denied were happening. They caught the attention of the White House, which is now monitoring Lewandowski’s hours and, according to the administration official, complaining about how difficult [“Bimbo #2”] Noem can be to reach. In response to the articles, Lewandowski and [“Bimbo #2”] Noem called various officials in the department to try to speed things up. “They were screaming,” one DHS employee told me about a call with ICE officials. “The level of disrespect and screaming at everybody in that room — I think people were really shocked and taken aback.” [“Bimbo #2”] Noem “dropped multiple F-bombs,” a former DHS staffer said. It was clear to everyone that she and Lewandowski had been embarrassed by the bad press and were now feeding off each other’s negative energy. They accused the people in the room of “lining their pockets” from government contracts, according to the former staffer, an accusation that struck them as a possible projection. At one point, a member of the team rattled off some acronyms. “Enough with the acronyms,” Lewandowski said. “I’ll give you an acronym: F-I-R-E-D.”

In mid-September, Trump called [“Bimbo #2”] Noem and Lewandowski into the Oval Office. The president had, according to the administration official, who was briefed on the meeting, heard concerns about their management style. “He was particularly mad at Corey” and about how “he can’t get along with anybody,” the official said. The two assuaged his concerns and left the meeting with their jobs intact — for now.

The expansion of DHS’s gulag archipelago continues apace. In September, [“Bimbo #2”] Noem held a press conference at the infamous Louisiana State Penitentiary, known as “Angola” for the slave plantation that used to be here. As reporters loaded onto shuttle buses at the gate, an official told us, “Most people who come in here and go down that road never get to come back out.”

We parked by an orange roadblock labeled ANGOLA RODEO, the site of the annual exhibition where prisoners participate in a series of events like “Convict Poker” (four inmates play poker seated at a table with a loose bull in the arena, and the last man sitting wins). Looming in front of us: a thicket of barbed wire and two patrol towers guarding a housing unit that was called the Dungeon back when it was used for solitary confinement.

The Dungeon had fallen into desuetude, but the Trump administration has given it a new purpose as a detention center for undocumented immigrants who have committed violent crimes. Fifty-one detainees have already been transferred inside, and there are plans to house as many as 400 in the future. Internally, DHS staff had been referring to the revamped facility as “Camp 47” — an homage to Trump — but its given name is the Louisiana Lockup.

The sky soon filled with military helicopters carrying [“Bimbo #2”] Noem, Lewandowski, Sheahan, Louisiana governor Jeff Landry, and Attorney General Pam Bondi. Lewandowski, dressed in all black and aviators, hung back with a group of staffers out of sight of the gathered camera people, while Landry, Bondi, Sheahan, and [“Bimbo #2”] Noem approached a podium beside a parked ICE SUV newly wrapped with the words PROTECT THE HOMELAND.

Landry was dressed in an olive-green hat and matching tactical shirt. The prison, he said in his thick Cajun accent, will be home to criminals who shouldn’t even bother trying to escape unless they want to contend with the “swamps filled with alligators and the forests filled with bears.”

“What will their day-to-day be like?” a journalist asked.

“What would you expect?” he retorted.

Landry said those who come here will have no interaction with any of the other 4,000 inmates living at Angola, more than 90 percent of whom committed violent crimes. The Louisiana Lockup will be filled with “the worst of the worst,” Landry told us. The message to any and all undocumented immigrants living in this country was clear: Get out or they will find you.

For most of the press conference, [“Bimbo #2”] Noem had stood expressionless, offering steely stares while Landry spoke about the need to get rapists and drug dealers and human traffickers off America’s streets. Then a journalist asked, “Every headline about Angola calls it ‘notorious.’ Was the decision to choose a prison with such a reputation deliberate to get people to self-deport?”

The question seemed to make her giddy. She looked around at her colleagues and then bent forward in laughter. “Absolutely!” she said with a grin.

https://nymag.com/intelligencer/article/kristi-noem-corey-lewandowski-dhs-fema-trump-enforcers.html

Washington Post: A D.C. neighborhood long home to immigrants pushes back against ICE arrests

The text messages ricocheted across Mount Pleasant, a historically diverse enclave two miles north of the White House, moments after someone said they saw federal agents stopping a Latino immigrant driving his daughter to school.

“At a raid now at mt p and Lamont!!!” popped up on Phaedra Siebert’s phone a few blocks from the intersection, she recalled later. Sprinting over, the former museum curator joined a crowd that was screaming at officers they assumed were with U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement.

“Shame on you!” they chanted. “Shame on you!”

“We’ve got ICE out here!” someone yelled. “ICE here!”

President Donald Trump’s crackdown on crime in D.C. roiled large swaths of the nation’s capital, as Washingtonians encountered police checkpoints, armed National Guard troops and masked immigration agents. Although the president’s 30-day emergency ended Wednesday, the heightened pace of immigration arrests has continued in the city.

In Mount Pleasant, a left-leaning neighborhood whose large Latino population has long been part of the community’s fabric, residents have responded out of a sense of kinship to the sight of ICE agents swooping in, presumably to apprehend people living and working there suspected of being in the country illegally.

On weekday mornings, those upset by the arrests volunteer to chaperone groups of children walking to schools. Others patrol the streets, some while walking their dogs and riding bikes. Everyone is on the lookout for agents in unmarked SUV’s with tinted windows and out of state license plates that are hard to miss against a backdrop of elegant brick rowhouses and apartment buildings and a colorful low-rise commercial corridor.

If something catches their attention, they blow homemade whistles — their high-pitched trill echoing through the streets — and text warnings to hundreds of neighbors, many of them on a messaging system the man behind it likened to a “bat signal.”

“Can we stop ICE from coming? No,” said Rick Reinhard, who has lived in Mount Pleasant for more than 50 years and helped launch the network, among several residents use to communicate. “But can we make it uncomfortable? … Yeah.”

Mount Pleasant residents have their reasons for focusing their concern on ICE. In the month since the start of Trump’s crackdown, according to White House officials, law enforcement has apprehended slightly more than 1,000 immigrants across D.C., accounting for about 38 percent of the arrests they have reported for the period.

Following Trump’s emergency declaration on Aug. 11, Attorney General Pam Bondi said D.C.’s lenient policies toward immigrants, which prohibited police from cooperating in ICE arrests, made the city more dangerous. Immigration agents intensified enforcement in areas such as Columbia Heights and Mount Pleasant, neighborhoods popular among the city’s 95,000 immigrants, more than a quarter of them estimated to be undocumented.

Siebert, 54, was on her own self-styled walking patrol Aug. 28 just before 8 a.m. when she saw the text about agents detaining the man at the corner of Mount Pleasant and Lamont streets.

As she arrived, she said, she saw that the officers already had the man in handcuffs and that his daughter was weeping. Loren Galesi, who also lives in the neighborhood, had positioned herself in front of what she thought was an agent’s car, an act of protest she later described as “so out of character for me.”

“In a political city, we’re not political,” Galesi, 42, a graduate student in history at Georgetown University, said of herself and her husband, who moved to Mount Pleasant with their two children in 2021. “I vote every four years, that’s the extent to my involvement.”

Something changed in her after the start of Trump’s crackdown, said Galesi, as she witnessed “these masked agents show up and take our neighbors away.”

At the intersection that morning, Galesi saw the agents place the man in a car and drive off. Her friend, Liz Sokolov, 50, an educator who had been on her own patrol when she came upon the crowd, was in tears. “It just feels like you’re living in a country you don’t recognize,” Sokolov said later.

She tried to comfort herself with the thought that the detained man “knew we didn’t want him taken away and knew we were using our voices to help.” Yet, a litany of unsettling questions remained, not the least of which was when the agents would return.

Everyone is scared

The ICE raids — and the possibility of more in the future — has caused fear in the neighborhood, a sloping pocket just off 16th Street NW with a diverse population of lawyers, policy analysts, Capitol Hill staffers, and blue collar workers, many of them immigrants from El Salvador.

The neighborhood has faced a variety of crises over the years, including a 1991 riot that began when a police officer shot a Salvadoran immigrant. A five alarm fire in an apartment building in 2008 displaced 200 low income Latino families. The pandemic delivered another wave of pain five years ago.

Six days after Trump’s Aug. 11 emergency declaration, the administration made it known that Mount Pleasant was on its radar. On social media, ICE posted a video of agents descending on a neighborhood plaza and ripping down a banner that used a Spanish epithet to denigrate the agency.

“We’re taking America back, baby,” an agent says in the video, his face concealed by sunglasses, a hat, and a black gaiter.

Residents replaced the banner with another — “No Deportations in Mt. Pleasant,” it read — though their defiance did not salve the general unease.

“People are really, really scared; they don’t want to go to their jobs, they don’t want to go shopping,” said Yasmin Romero-Castillo, head of a local tenants association who buys groceries for residents too afraid to leave their apartments.

As she spoke, she sipped tea at Dos Gringos, a cafe whose owner, Alex Kramer, has been a Mount Pleasant fixture since 1994. Kramer said her business suffered during the crime emergency because employees from nearby shops weren’t going to work and dropping in for coffee. “The neighborhood is dead; they have killed the vibe,” Kramer said. “You listen for the whistles and the helicopters. Everyone is scared. I’m scared.”

The shrill of a whistle and a woman shouting, “Get your hands off of her!” is what caught Claudia Schlosberg’s attention on Labor Day as she watered her garden.

Schlosberg, 71, a civil rights and health care attorney who has lived in Mount Pleasant since 1978, dropped her hose and ran to the corner where U.S. Park Police officers and other agents were questioning the driver of a van and her passenger.

The officers, Schlosberg said, smashed the window, pulled the passenger out and whisked him away. A woman who questioned the arrest had been pulled off her bicycle and over to the sidewalk by a man in a vest marked “Police.” As she tried to video, Schlosberg said the same man threatened her with pepper spray and ordered her to move back.

“What are you doing?” Schlossberg recalled responding. “Why are you doing this? Get out of here!”

Two days later, Schlosberg was part of a group of 50 residents who went to a local library, expecting to voice their concerns over the immigration arrests at a meeting with someone from the office of D.C. Mayor Muriel E. Bowser (D).

Many in the neighborhood were already displeased that Bowser had signed an executive order directing her police force to coordinate with federal authorities indefinitely, though the mandate did not include ICE.

They never got to share those sentiments. Anthony Robertson, a Bowser staffer, showed up only to depart quickly without taking questions. “It really feels like there’s no one we can turn to protect our community,” Schlosberg said.

A mayoral spokesperson, in a statement, did not directly address the reason for Robertson’s departure but said the administration would “continue to work with the community” through “the appropriate senior officials who can provide the most relevant and timely information.”

The ‘eyes and ears’ of the community

Even before Trump took office in January, Reinhard contemplated ways to organize Mount Pleasant, figuring that the neighborhood’s immigrant population could be vulnerable if the president carried out a campaign threat to takeover the city.

By the spring, Reinhard, a photographer with a history of activism in the neighborhood, had started a texting network and recruited a few people. Then came Trump’s emergency declaration and membership on the channel ticked up: 50 people, then 80, then 100, then 200 and more.

Recruits are vetted to ensure they don’t work for the Trump administration, as well as law enforcement and news organizations, and are encouraged not to talk to outsiders about the channel. “There’s so much concern that they could seize our phones and infiltrate a group chat,” Galesi said. “There’s a strong sense that if you don’t live here, we can’t trust you.”

One neighborhood restaurant owner described the messaging system as the “eyes and ears” of Mount Pleasant. “As soon as someone posts they’ve seen something, someone will be like, ‘I’ll be there in five minutes,’” said the owner, who spoke on the condition of anonymity, fearful of drawing unwelcome attention to the restaurant. “It’s almost like a constant patrol. Instead of walkie-talkies, they’re using their phones.”

Others started their own chat groups, including Sokolov, who worried that a local day care center could be vulnerable because it caters to immigrants families. A friend with a 3D printer volunteered to make nearly 200 whistles they distributed across Mount Pleasant.

Siebert started her patrols weekday mornings, beginning at 6:45 a.m. She has become adept, she said, at spotting unmarked police SUVs, “usually black or charcoal,” with their darkened windows and concealed emergency lights.

“I’m glad to be doing something of use when it’s easy to feel entirely impotent,” she said. “I’m also glad to find a way to use my privilege as a nice White lady. People don’t clock me as a someone patrolling the patrollers but this is what we do. One of my tools is blonde hair.”

By the end of the first week of September, the visits from federal agents seemed to subside. Residents remained on alert, though. Their messaging systems still hummed. Patrols persisted.

As parents picked up children at the Bancroft Elementary School one afternoon, a man pointed down the street as he walked his Chihuahua and shouted, “Hey everybody! Be careful! ICE is out there!”

Heads turned, footsteps quickened.

“They’re down the street!” the man repeated. “They’re down there!”

At the end of the block, there was no sign of ICE or any other law enforcement, for that matter. “A UPS man said he’d seen them outside an alley,” the man explained. “And in another alley.”

He shrugged and moved on.

A few feet away, a boy turned to a stranger.

“What’s ICE?” he asked, his brow furrowed before he resumed his walk home.

https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/us/a-d-c-neighborhood-long-home-to-immigrants-pushes-back-against-ice-arrests/ar-AA1MIU0Q

Slingshot News: ‘We’re Allowed’: Trump Claims He Is Above The Law, Says He Can Attack Harvard All He Wants In Interview

President Donald Trump claimed that he is above the law, saying that he can attack Harvard University all that he wants. Trump is not legally allowed to withhold federal funds from Harvard. 

https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/politics/we-re-allowed-trump-claims-he-is-above-the-law-says-he-can-attack-harvard-all-he-wants-in-interview/vi-AA1MfRvI

News Nation: Mexican immigrants more likely to remain behind bars after arrest, data shows

Mexican nationals are more likely to be detained after being apprehended by federal immigration officers, according to data compiled by Transactional Records Access Clearinghouse.

TRAC figures show that in July, 57 percent of Mexican nationals arrested for crossing the border or for being in the country illegally were held in detention centers while their proceedings take place in immigration court.

By contrast, overall, only 30 percent of migrants were detained after their apprehensions.

According to TRAC, ICE determines when a person is held, and that there is no specific pattern in the decision-making.

“In reality, little is known about the factors that influence these custody decisions,” writes TRAC. “The ICE agents have wide discretion to make decisions and their criteria is rarely revealed.”

According to TRAC, it appears decisions are taken by the agents themselves and are influenced by their own backgrounds and ethnic identity.

However, the state in which migrants are apprehended can also determine whether they are detained.

TRAC says being detained can have major implications, adding that individuals who remain in custody have a more difficult time obtaining the documents and the legal help to make a case against deportation.

TRAC also says that the vast majority of individuals in ICE custody, through June 30, had no criminal record, and that 4 out of 5, either had no record or had only committed a minor offense such as a traffic violation.

Racial discrimination? Probably!

Click on one of the links below to see their detention rates nationality by nationality.

https://www.newsnationnow.com/us-news/immigration/border-coverage/mexican-immigrants-more-likely-to-remain-behind-bars-after-arrest-data-shows

Daily Beast: ‘Homie’: DHS Ridicules Dad They Plan to Deport to Tiny African Nation

Kilmar Abrego Garcia has received a letter about where the DHS plans to send him next.

Maryland dad Kilmar Abrego Garcia has learned where the Department of Homeland Security has decided to deport him next.

In an email obtained by Fox News, lawyers for the DHS and Immigration and Customs Enforcement informed Abrego Garcia’s legal team on Friday that his new intended destination is the tiny African nation of Eswatini, formerly known as Swaziland.

Ridiculing Abrego Garcia’s legal claim of fear of persecution or torture—a core asylum principle—in many of the nations the government has considered deporting him to, the DHS wrote on social media that “Homie is afraid of the entire western hemisphere”.

The derisory use of the term “homie” sparked outrage on social media.

Abrego Garcia, who is currently in ICE custody in Virginia, became the face of the Trump administration’s immigration crackdown in March after he was mistakenly deported to El Salvador.

The government admitted to an “administrative error” following his return from the Central American nation, but is still intent on removing him from the U.S. over charges of human smuggling.

His lawyers claim such charges are a “preposterous and vindictive” punishment for challenging ICE policy.

Eswatini is the fourth potential destination for Abrego Garcia, who was taken into ICE custody for a second time on Aug. 25, and prepared for processing to Uganda.

A federal judge blocked the plan, accepting his lawyers’ concerns over fear of persecution or torture, ruling that it is “absolutely forbidden” to remove Abrego Garcia from the U.S. until further legal processing can be carried out. However, the DHS has stated it is not buying his legal defense.

“That claim of fear is hard to take seriously, especially given that you have claimed (through your attorneys) that you fear persecution or torture in at least 22 different countries,” the legal letter reads.

“Nonetheless, we hereby notify you that your new country of removal is Eswatini, Africa.”

The letter does not elaborate on how the DHS chose the country for Abrego Garcia’s intended removal.

The Daily Beast has contacted the DHS for comment.

DHS boss Kristi Noem has made it a personal mission to see Abrego Garcia deported. She has previously claimed her department is going after “the worst of the worst” and, in August, claimed the man is a “monster.”

“This illegal alien… is a MS-13 gang member, human trafficker, serial domestic abuser, and child predator,” Noem wrote on social media.

Abrego Garcia’s legal team has repeatedly denied all these allegations, including the often-trotted out line about his membership of the notorious MS-13 gang. Multiple judges have said there is no evidence to suggest he is gang-affiliated, while noting he has no prior criminal history.

In April, President Donald Trump insisted that Abrego Garcia had the gang name tattooed on his knuckles, challenging a reporter in an interview that an image of Abrego Garcia’s hand with “MS-13″ clearly superimposed over it was real.

At roughly 120 miles long and 80 miles wide, Eswatini is one of the smallest nations in Africa. It is the last absolute monarchy on the continent, and has a population of 1.2 million people. The country, which is bordered by South Africa and Mozambique, changed its name from Swaziland in 2018 to avoid confusion with Switzerland.

Abrego Garcia’s attorney, Simon Sandoval-Moshenberg, says the Trump administration is “weaponizing the immigration system in a manner that is completely unconstitutional.”

https://www.thedailybeast.com/dhs-ridicules-kilmar-abrego-garciawho-they-now-plan-to-deport-to-eswatini

Daily Beast: Pam [Bimbo #3] Bondi Takes Aim at Boston Citing Crimes From Elsewhere

The attorney general suggested Boston Mayor Michelle Wu is somehow responsible for an alleged crime that occurred 100 miles outside city limits.

Attorney General Pam Bondi cited crimes that occurred outside of Boston to criticize the city’s mayor in a head-scratching interview with Fox News.

Bondi, 59, told Sean Hannity that Boston—one of the safest major cities in America—is actually “not” safe, citing a trio of grisly crimes. She singled out Mayor Michelle Wu, claiming the 40-year-old Democrat has lost control of the city.

“A Haitian national was charged with raping a child in a migrant center,” she said. “An 18-year-old illegal alien from Haiti molested a 10-year-old child. An illegal from El Salvador, 11 counts of rape against a child … I could go on and on about the crimes in the Boston area. So, if she’s not going to protect the people of Boston, we are.”

As Mediaite first noted, the alleged migrant center incident took place 20 miles from Boston, the alleged molestation took place 30 miles outside city limits, and the incident involving the Salvadoran national took place on Nantucket, an island about 100 miles south of the state capital.

Wu, of course, has zero jurisdiction over crimes that take place well outside Boston’s city limits. It would be the equivalent of blaming President Donald Trump for something that occurred over the border in Mexico or Canada.

The Trump administration, which has already deployed the National Guard to the streets of Los Angeles and Washington, D.C., has signaled plans for similar actions in other Democrat-controlled cities, including Boston.

Reached for comment, Wu’s office said in a statement: “For months, the Trump DOJ, DHS, and ICE have been spreading blatant lies and threatening to ‘bring hell’ to cities like Boston who refuse to bow down to their authoritarian agenda, so this unconstitutional attack is not a surprise.”

It continued, “This country was born facing down bullies, with Bostonians leading the way. Today, Boston is the safest major city in the country because we have worked to build trust in the community, so that everyone feels safe seeking help or reporting a crime. We will not be bullied or intimidated into abandoning the efforts that make Boston a safe home for everyone.”

The administration sued Boston and Wu on Thursday over an ordinance that limits local police from cooperating with federal immigration enforcement.

Wu responded that same day, “This unconstitutional attack on our city is not a surprise. Boston is a thriving community, the economic and cultural hub of New England, and the safest major city in the country—but this administration is intent on attacking our community to advance their own authoritarian agenda.”

Boston is not suffering from a crime spike. It reported its lowest homicide rate since 1957 last year, and other violent and property crimes are on a “downward trend.”

Bondi refused to let those facts get in the way of her talking point.

“Michelle Wu is one of the worst offenders in the entire country,” she told Hannity. “She says Boston is safe. It’s not.”

https://www.thedailybeast.com/pam-bondi-takes-aim-at-boston-citing-crimes-from-elsewhere

Independent: CBS News says it will no longer edit interviews on Sunday show ‘Face the Nation’, days after Kristi Noem complaint

The network announced Friday it will now only broadcast live or live-to-tape interviews, subject to national security or legal restrictions

CBS News says that it will no longer edit interviews on its Sunday news show, “Face the Nation”, days after a complaint from Homeland Security Secretary Kristi Noem.

The broadcaster announced Friday it will now only broadcast live or live-to-tape interviews, subject to national security or legal restrictions, on the show.

The decision comes after Secretary Noem claimed that CBS News had “shamefully edited the interview to whitewash the truth” when she appeared on August 31 to discuss Kilmar Abrego Garcia, a migrant mistakenly deported to El Salvador who has become a high-profile case in the Trump administration’s crackdown on immigration.

Noem’s interview with “Face the Nation” was taped in advance. After it was aired, Noem claimed that an important section of the interview had been cut, and posted her full, unedited response on X.

In the full response, she made a series of unproven accusations about Abrego Garcia, alleging that he was a member of gang MS-13, a “wife-beater” and had solicited nude photos from minors. Abrego Garcia has denied the accusations against him.

In response to Noem’s accusations, CBS News said that four minutes of the secretary’s interview had been edited out for timing purposes.

On Friday, the network said it will now only broadcast live or live-to-tape interviews on the show, meaning guests’ statements will not be edited, subject to legal or national security restrictions.

In a statement to The Independent, a CBS News spokesperson said: “In response to audience feedback over the past week, we have implemented a new policy for greater transparency in our interviews.

“Face the Nation will now only broadcast live or live-to-tape interviews (subject to national security or legal restrictions). This extra measure means the television audience will see the full, unedited interview on CBS and we will continue our practice of posting full transcripts and the unedited video online.”

The spokesperson did not comment on whether Noem’s complaint had affected the decision.

Noem’s unedited interview was posted on CBS News’ website and on itYouTube channel.

The broadcaster’s change in editing policy is likely to renew claims that CBS is capitulating to the Trump administration, after settling with the president over his “60 Minutes” lawsuit.

Trump had accused the network of “partisan and unlawful acts of election and voter interference” intended to “mislead the public and attempt to tip the scales” of the 2024 presidential election in favor of former vice president Kamala Harris after it aired different clips of her interview on “60 Minutes” and “Face the Nation.”

Trump repeatedly alleged that Harris’ interview was edited by CBS News at the direction of her campaign, which the network denied.

Ultimately, CBS’s parent company, Paramount Global, agreed to pay $16 million to Trump to settle the lawsuit.

The new CBS News editing policy raises the possibility that it would allow guests to spread unchecked falsehoods on “Face the Nation”. However, hosts will still be able to fact-check or challenge claims made by interview subjects, an anonymous CBS News employee told the Associated Press.

Now King Donald’s crybabies will have to find other reasons to whine about their lousy interview performances.

https://www.the-independent.com/news/world/americas/us-politics/cbs-interview-editing-face-the-nation-kristi-noem-b2821502.html

CNN: Florida’s new immigrant detention site dubbed ‘Deportation Depot’ is now taking detainees, officials say

Florida has opened its second immigration detention site, dubbed “Deportation Depot,” amid an ongoing legal battle over its controversial “Alligator Alcatraz” facility.

The facility is at a temporarily closed state prison, the Baker Correctional Institution, which is housing 117 detainees with the capacity to hold 1,500 people, according to the office of Gov. Ron DeSantis. It is about 45 miles west of Jacksonville near the Osceola National Forest.

“Deportation Depot” opened a day after a federal appeals court temporarily blocked a judge’s order requiring the state and federal government to shut down “Alligator Alcatraz,” located deep in the marshy wetlands of the Everglades.

The facility, wrapped in tall, wire fencing, is made up of a number of a squat, single-story buildings. Guard towers are positioned strategically around the campus and, out front, a Humvee is parked next to a white pop-up tent.

Other states have announced similar sites to supplement what the Trump administration has described as limited capacity in immigration detention centers nationwide. “Deportation Depot” is part of that equation and just one part of the Florida governor’s push for an expansion of the state’s detention centers to hold immigrants.

DeSantis is doubling down on his plans to build a third detention site in Florida’s panhandle, which he has called “Panhandle Pokey,” along with another facility at a Florida National Guard training center known as Camp Blanding, roughly 30 miles southwest of Jacksonville.

Other proposed immigration facilities include Indiana’s “Speedway Slammer” and Louisiana’s “Camp 57,” located at the country’s largest maximum-security prison. The Louisiana State Penitentiary, commonly known as Angola, is an 18,000-acre facility situated an hour north of Baton Rouge.

The new detention facilities are emerging as the White House continues to push authorities to make at least 3,000 immigration-related arrests per day as part of the administration’s mass deportation efforts.

Many detainees have so far been sent to Guantanamo Bay or deported to El Salvador’s CECOT mega prison.

Back in Florida, “Deportation Depot” was announced in August just before a federal judge placed a preliminary injunction on “Alligator Alcatraz” that would have effectively shut that site down.

Since a federal appeals court stayed the lower court’s order to force the closure of “Alligator Alcatraz,” the state has said it will continue transporting detainees out of there.

The ruling was a major blow to environmental groups, who filed a federal lawsuit asking a judge to block operations and construction at the site until environmental laws are followed.

The Everglades site had been the subject of intense criticism for its treatment of migrants who had been confined there amid sweltering heat, bug infestations and meager meals, prompting members of Congress and state representatives that witnessed the conditions to demand its immediate closure.

https://www.cnn.com/2025/09/05/us/deportation-depot-florida-open